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John Hughes' Movies

This guy is a genius of movies. Many 80s classics were penned by him.

Weird Science
 

Wyatt: Gary, by the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads?
Garry: Ceremonial. 

Lisa: You okay?
Garry: Well, my nuts are halfway up my ass, but other than that, I'm perfect! 

Lisa: If you ever get the chance, shower with them. I did. Mmm, it's a mindscrambler. Hurts so good. 

Garry: They're gonna shit egg rolls. 

Lisa: You had to be big shots didn't you. You had to show off. When are you gonna learn that people will like you for who you are, not for what you can give them. Well, in your race for power and glory, you forgot one small detail.
Wyatt: We forgot to hook up the doll.
Lisa: You forgot to hook up the doll. 

Lisa: I can be a real serious bitch if I don't get what I want. 

Lisa: If you don't cheer up, I'll blow your face off.

Lisa: There's going to be sex, drugs, rock'n'roll. Chips, dips, chains, whips.

 
The Breakfast Club
 
Andrew: Why do you have to insult everybody?
John Bender: I'm being honest, asshole. 

Andrew: We're all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it, that's all. 

Brian Johnson: Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you're crazy to make an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us... In the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...
Andrew Clark: ...and an athlete...
Allison Reynolds: ...and a basket case...
Claire Standish: ...a princess...
John Bender: ...and a criminal...
Brian Johnson: Does that answer your question?... Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club. 

John Bender: Screws fall out all the time, the world is an imperfect place. 

Brian Johnson: I'm a fucking idiot because I can't make a lamp?
John Bender: No. You're a genius because you can't make a lamp. 

Claire Standish: Why didn't you want me to know that you are a virgin?
Brian Johnson: Because it's my business - my personal business!
John Bender: Actually, Brian, it doesn't sound like you're doing any business...
 
 
Sixteen Candles

Samantha: I can't believe my grandmother actually felt me up. 

Jake: I can get a piece of ass anytime I want. Shit, I've got Caroline in the bedroom right now, passed out cold. I could violate her ten different ways if I wanted to.
The Geek: [almost chokes on a pretzel] What are you waiting for? 
The Geek: I mean, not many girls in contemporary American society today would give their underwear to help a geek like me. 

Randy: My brother paid a dollar last night to see your underwear.
Samantha: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH.

Ferris Beuller's Day Off

Cameron: Ferris Bueller, you're my hero. 

Ferris: Look, it's real simple. Whatever mileage we put on, we'll take off.
Cameron: How?
Ferris: We'll drive home backwards. 

Ferris: The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom; I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a dead lock, but, uh... you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school. 

Singing Nurse: I heard that you were feeling ill. Headache, fever, and a chill. I came to help restore your pluck, cause I'm the nurse who likes to... 

Ferris: I do have a test today. that wasn't bullshit. It's on European socialism. I mean, really, what's the point? I'm not European. I don't plan on being European. So who cares if they're socialists? They could be fascist anarchists. It still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a car.

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Nothing says "I digress" better than that.
- The Immunity Thread

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